GUEST BLOG - MY STAYCATION

"In case there is a loss in cabin pressure, yellow oxygen masks will deploy from the ceiling compartment located above you.  To secure, pull the mask towards you, secure the elastic strap to your head, and fasten it so it covers your mouth and nose. Breathe normally.  Even if the bag does not inflate, please keep in mind that oxygen is flowing.  Please make sure to secure your own mask before assisting others."

Sounds familiar?

These few sentences are a part of an airline's pre-flight safety demonstration. Let's focus on the last sentence and most important portion of this entire paragraph: “Please make sure to secure your own mask before assisting others.” What, you might ask, does this have to do with a blog for MWMs? Let me share my thoughts with you.

As MWMs, sight is often lost of the fact that we are also women, truth be told, that is all that we really are at our core.  We are WOMEN - women who happen to be Married, who happen to be Working and who also happen to be Mothers.  These are some pretty heavy roles and we are courageous for wearing so many hats (please pop your collar at this point).

Securing our masks before assisting others is important and as MWMs we often spend ourselves assisting everyone else and often times we neglect to secure or own proverbial mask.  What do I mean by this? And how do we secure everyone else's mask first?  We take time to focus on the needs of our immediate family, the house, the dog, the cat, our parents, our in-laws, our church family, our coworkers, our friends, our various civic and community groups, and the list goes on and on.  We ensure that everyone else's mask is secured first, before ours.  And then we look around for our masks when we are already dog tired and unable to assist ourselves.

How many of us really take time to focus on resting, relaxing and rejuvenating our bodies (and by rest I don't just mean sleep),. 

 Inspired by Tiffany’s staycation and empowered by my loving husband, Jevon – I decided to plan my very own staycation so that I can “adorn the mask first”.  YES!  I decided that I should take time out for me – to rest, to relax and to rejuvenate and I did just that. 

This is my bag I packed then proceeded to run out of the house with before I changed my mind.

Driving to the Hilton, nervous and anxious but forging ahead nonetheless…

One weekend a few weeks ago I nervously packed my bags and even more nervously checked into the British Colonial Hilton Hotel BY MYSELF.  Nervously because this was the first time that I had ever done anything like this and I run guilt trips on myself – if you can believe that!  The random thoughts going through my mind on the Friday evening and into Saturday morning were “I should be home with my family” or “maybe my husband should’ve come with me” or “how are they making it without me”.  Needless to say, once I was able to relax and sit by the beach and soak in the experience – I … was … fine.  And you know what? My family was okay.  They held down the fort.  They were okay.  And so was I. 

Me…laying in the gorgeous…heavenly…cabana…curled up with a fabulous book!!!!

I thoroughly enjoyed my staycation and would encourage anyone who feels the need to rest, relax and rejuvenate to “adorn the mask first”.  It is a gift.  And I am all the better for it.

The awesome view from my room…

Gorgeous … heavenly … cabana!

I left the hotel that Sunday morning, feeling refreshed, reinvigorated and reenergized.  And this is all because I took the time to first adorn the mask to myself which enabled and continues to enable me to adorn the mask to others around me. 

The lesson for me in all of this was that I now know and accept that I too need to be taken care of and that there are times - even though my husband and family do an awesome job of taking care of me - that we really need to take care of ourselves, for ourselves. 

Headed out on Saturday afternoon!

So I have since committed to setting aside pockets of time each week – just for me.  And my family loves me for it!!! And I love me too!!!

Written By
Sandena Neely
Guest Blogger

MOTHERHOOD: Staycation 2013

Once upon a time there lived a woman. Tiffany Yvette was her name. She was a mother to two beautiful children who, as fun as they could be, some days they weren't fun, not so much! 

Tiffany was always consumed with all the details of raising a three year old daughter and a one year old son. Every morning as she opened her eyes her thoughts swarmed throughout her brain. 

'Don't forget to pack Channing's swim clothes especially the towel, you don't want to have to borrow the swim instructor's towel like you did the last time.' Remember to leave the television on BabyFirst TV for Chase, he watches too much television but at least BabyFirst is educational. I so don't want him to be a couch potato. At some point I have to teach the housekeeper how to use the remote for the television...AGAIN! Is is really that confusing? Did Channing do her homework last night? I have to remember to purchase another pair of scissors for Channing. Where the hell are they? I looked everywhere. I bet Chase threw them away. Which Lowe's did I go to and found those scissors anyway? Lowe's oh yes, Channing needs more hair product. Remember to give her medicine before we leave. Does Chase need medicine? No he's good, but he does need diapers and milk, and some new shoes for church, well church clothes too. I have to get to Lullaby. I bet all the new stock is gone.

The thoughts go on and on. Then begins the to-do list for the house. I need to remind Eric to... At this point Tiffany, having only been awake for three minutes decides to get out of bed and begin her day.

She did this every morning, every day of the week, every day of the month until finally it was the month of May, May 12th to be exact.

Many years ago the king of the land, a very wise king, a compassionate king proclaimed the second Sunday of May would be declared Mother's Day.

Tiffany was thrilled. She was thrilled because she was married to Eric, also a compassionate bloke. Compassionate and wise. He was wise beyond his years. So wise that he granted Tiffany her one wish for Mother's Day. 

What was this wish you may ask?

Tiffany's one wish was to be alone. Alone to lay. Alone to read. Alone to recuperate, to reinvigorate to resuscitate. 

And so Eric granted Tiffany's wish. Thank you again Babes.

This past Sunday, I, Tiffany Yvette went to church at 7 a.m. with my family. Here is Channing, Chase and I and my rose I received for being a mother. Clearly Channing is knighting me with my own rose!

Afterwards, Eric checked me into a hotel for a day and night to myself. Below is the view from my room. I gazed over the balcony breathing the smell of freedom! For just this day, this place would be my playground.

I stood solemnly and reflected for a moment. I gave thanks for my husband, who I confess, I cried when he was about to leave. He sacrificed to ensure my one wish was granted. I gave thanks for my children. I have two healthy blessings that make my heart full when I touch their fingers and look at their smiles. Both of them were once inside of my belly, yes the belly that still looks preggers by the way! I gave thanks for the beauty of God's creation. Our little island, depending on where we are standing, looks like paradise. I gave thanks for my hectic all consuming life. I was thankful! I am still grateful!

And then I went downstairs. I put went to my favorite pool, got my towels and let the day begin! Here are a few photos to recapture my day of escape!

Posing for the camera

Reading

Drink number one finished! Time for a polish change.

Drink Number Two

Wardrobe change after two laps of the Lazy River

Taking in God's beauty once again

Exhausted! Time to go back to the room

By 7 p.m. my hair was washed and set.

By 8 p.m. my room service had been delivered.

By 9 p.m. I was asleep. 

The morning came quick but I was up and ready with pearls and curls to go to work. Did I have a great day? Yes I did! Am I grateful for another Mother's day Staycation? Yes I am! Do I plan to do this all over again next year Lord's willing? Yes I do! Maybe Next year I can do this will some of you. (Start talking to your husband now!)

Eric arrived to pick up Tiffany after dropping Channing to school. He was overjoyed to see her. She was overjoyed to see him too. 

And they lived happily ever after.

The Halls

MOTHERHOOD: Mother's Day Tradition

Dear Sharelle,

On our Facebook Page you wrote a comment, "SOOOOOO GIRLS......What's up for Mother's Day?"
It is great that you asked because I happen to love my Mother's Day Tradition. I look forward to it every year. I came up with the idea on my own! I believe this is going to be my third or will it be my fourth year doing what I call to be an ingenious idea.

Are you ready to know what I do readers? Can you guess Sharelle?

You'll never guess. Can you tell how excited I am typing this blog?

Here we go....

On Mother's Day, I go to church with my family so I can stand and receive my obligatory Mother's Day Flower. Then my family and I drive over to Atlantis, but not for what you think. We drive over to Atlantis so I may check - in for the night.

YES! ME and me alone.



My view from my room during my first staycation

Every Mother's Day I have a staycation. I check in Sunday, we go to 7:00am Mass so I can have a full day. I spend the night, then the next morning, check out and drive to work.

Exhale.......



 Imagine laying here!

Oh how beautiful it is to have a day to myself! Oh how awesome it is to lay out by the pool with my Kindle and a cocktail! Oh how fantabulous it is to sleep the whole night through without Channing getting up to pee, without Chase wandering out of his crib, without hearing Eric snore.

Exhale even louder!

A surprise in the room upon my return!

Now, I know at least someone reading this thinks I am being selfish, how could I not spend time with my family on Mother's Day? What kind of mother am I who doesn't want to be with her children on Mother's Day? Don't get me wrong, to each her own but that simply is not how I want to be celebrated! On a day designated to celebrate my sacrifice, dedication and tireless effort to keep everything and everyone together, I want to be left alone and not have to do anything related to anyone else.

Now I must say that I am blessed to have a mother who doesn't like the hustle and bustle of Mother's Day. She is not one who has to go to a restaurant on Mother's Day. With that said, I am able to relish in my day because I do not have to make plans for her. THANK YOU MUMMY!!!!!!!!!!

If your mother is different, how about giving her a staycation. You and your mom can enjoy a spa date.  During my last stay I had a massage at Mandara Spa Atlantis. Heavenly!

My staycation is so ingenious because Eric and the kids can have a full day with his mother and participate in his extended family's Mother's Day plans. My husband does not have to balance me and his mother on this day. On this day, Eric's mother has him all to herself!!!!!!!!!!!!

And so Sharelle to answer your question, "What's up for Mother's Day?"...

...A Staycation.

If you like the idea, you should try it too. Try it alone or with a girlfriend!  There are so many hotels to choose from. It is totally worth it and truly a Mother's Day!

Until I blog again,
Tiffany

P.S. Sharelle what are you doing for Mother's Day?