Thank Goodness Part Two

Packed and ready to go!
Sing with me please. "Oh happy day! Oh happy day!

Yesterday, I traveled to the airport. It was one of my happiest journeys to the Linden Pindling International Airport. I wasn't happy because I was getting off of the rock, I was happy because my two adorable children were getting on the airplane with my mother...the best grandmother in the world. I thought she was an awesome mother but she is a way better grandmother!

Due to the fact that she misses her grandchildren immensely, my mother has agreed, sorry requested that she take my children, yes both of them, a five year old and a two year old to America for the entire summer!

Daddy Photo

Off and away!

And just like that they were off. Channing is Miss America and Chase had popcorn; they walked away without incident! My mother asked, "Are you about to cry now?" as I hugged her. I told her, "Enjoy!" She is about to experience my life!

Let the summer begin!
If I were concerned, weepy, anxious or weary about our children leaving the homestead, below you will find the photos that my cousin's wife emailed. Channing and Chase are visiting their cousins for the next few week before they travel to my brother's home!

Look at the three different facial expressions!

Chase trying to remain a part of the group!

Say "Cheese"
And so I repeat my sentiments. Thank goodness for grandmothers, uncles, aunties and now cousins too!

For those of you that are wondering if I cried at the airport. Ahhhhh yeah "NO!"

Until I blog again,

The Birds and The Bees

Time to have the Talk

The other Sunday sitting down in church my nine year old daughter leans over and whispers to me.  “Mummy what does rape mean?”

I responded, “I will tell you after church”, hoping that she would forget to ask, she didn’t.  She promptly asked the question again as soon as we got in the car.  I paused and said.  “It’s when someone has sex with you against your will.”  

Interestingly enough her response was a very nonchalant “Oh” accompanied by a head shake.  I thought Oh? Oh!  I was expecting a blizzard of questions.  One of them being what is sex? But noooooo, all I got was “Oh”.  I figured she was going to come back to me later that day and question more, but she didn’t.  So of course, I started thinking that it is probably time for us to have that proverbial “Birds and Bees” talk.

Sigh.  Already!  Yes Already.  If she already knows what sex is, and I am still crossing my fingers that she doesn’t, then its best that she gets her information from me and not the fast little girl at school. 

That little encounter encouraged me to start thinking about this whole subject.  I started asking myself some questions. Like “What is the right age to have the “Talk”?  How much information should I give?  If I do have the talk too early will I rob my child of her innocence?  Again, why don’t these kids come with instruction manuals?  As parents we are left to figure this out on our own.  And each parent handles it their own way.
I came up with three very different categories of parents. 

The first is the “Spell-its”.  These are the parents that cannot say the word sex so they prefer to spell it.  Many of your parents may fit into this category.  These parents resort to saying to their children;.  “If you get pregnant, I’ll kill you.” Or “ Boy, you better not bring no baby home to this house. Keep ya tings in your pants”.  They never explain anything and they are certainly not entertaining of questions from a curious young mind.  They are quick to call their children “brazen” or “fresh”.  And if their children are ever caught with the children of the “TMI-parents” the girls are threatened with a bottle of hot sauce and the boys are threatened with castration.

The “TMI-parent”, too much information parent, are those that are too willing to talk and share information.  They buy videos and books and do demonstrations using inanimate objects.  While their hearts are in the right place, the embarrassment the child feels usually over-shadows the information they are giving.  I personally do not feel that I need to show my child a video of copulation.  That brings up another point, the TMI parent uses the text book words to describe genitalia.  Or God forbid the slang words.  They would never see the need to say the word V-jay-jay.

The final group is the “Need-to-knows”.  This group only gives the child the information that they need to know at that particular point in their life.  They can also be called the “Just enoughs”.  Just enoughs only give you the information you are asking for and nothing more.  They only discuss the topic if they are cornered.  They carry a strict “Don’t ask, don’t tell” rule.  I feel this is where I fall. 

After being pressured for weeks by my husband, I finally had a talk with my nine year old about having her period.  She has not had hers yet and I was figuring I had a few more years.  However, my husband was very paranoid about her getting the information now.  So I mustered up the courage and talked to her.  It went fine.  At least that is what I thought.  So, a few months later, her Dad asks her if I told her what to do if her period comes, you can obviously see which of the three categories he falls in.  She answers “No.”
I turned around shocked.  “Yes I did!” 

“No you didn’t.  When I asked you what to do when it happens you said “Just come to me.”  

Mission Unaccomplished.

Most of my friends say that their parents never even tried to talk to them about the birds and the bees.  Yet they turned out alright.  But, I liken it to finding a store in the US without a map.  Yes, you will eventually get there but you would probably take a route that was full of toll booths and it might take you twice as long.  It is definitely a talk that should happen.  But the question remains, When?

I am open to your advice.  Let me know what you did and how you did it.  Leave your comments below.

Until next time,

Member of the Just enough club.

Thank Goodness For Grandparents, Aunties and Uncles!

Channing and my mother
My children have the privilege of knowing grandparents on both sides of our family.Our children have stories about 'Grandma' my mother, 'Grammy', Eric's mother and 'Papa', Eric's Dad.

Unfortunately, I did not have this opportunity. It is for that reason I am thankful.
Channing and Eric's Dad
Chase and Eric's Mom

Chase with his Auntie!
In addition to grandparents Channing and Chase have an aunt and an uncle who are just involved in their lives.

Uncle Trevor hanging out with us!
When I add up all the contributions from these five individuals I can include Grandma who is responsible for making Halloween costumes every year and Channing's school uniforms, Auntie V, who bakes all birthday cakes and cupcakes, Grammy and Papa who opened their arms and home to Chase from birth and most recently the last few months and Uncle Trevor who created a business in his niece and nephew's name.

For the last five years Eric and I have been extremely blessed! We love our families and they love us too. If anyone asked either of us if there was anything more our family could do to assist us I doubt we could think of a response.

Well Grandma and Uncle Trevor have thought of yet another way to bless Eric and I while blessing Channing and Chase and actually themselves. With this one offer, we all benefit! 

You see Grandma and Uncle Trevor live in America. They miss interacting with our two little darlings on a daily basis! It is for this reason that on Thursday of this week, yes in three days, Grandma, my mother will be taking Channing and Chase to the great land of opportunity for the summer.....the entire summer!
Yes I typed it...the entire summer!

Eric and I getting excited for a bit of freedom along with Candi who is excited for us as well....kind of!

Don't get me wrong we will miss our children but thank goodness for family. I am so grateful for the opportunity to go where I want and do what I want whenever I want. Thank you mummy! Thank you big brother Trevor.

For all of you that are celebrating with me, thank you! Let's get together and have some fun! For all of you that are judging me for sending my children away for the summer, forget you!

Stay tuned for my post on Friday...the day after the kids leave and my first day of freedom!

Until I blog again,

Good Times and Good People

It's always important to have a friend to share, laugh, cry and plain ole have awesome times with...

Tiffany, I appreciate you!


It's Pah-tee time!

This is  the before

This is the after.  We came, we drank, we danced until our feet hurt, we got soaked in the rain.  It was great!

Tiffany realized she was wearing an earring for a bracelet! Hey, the party started at 4am. At least I had my nails on both hands polished!  We crack ourselves up.

Tiffany charging her phone Thursday past as we hung out before the start of the long weekend!

Cheers to all the Married Working Mothers!  Hope you had an awesome weekend!

Life is to be enjoyed.  To be lived in the moment.  To be surrounded by the people you love and who love you.  Live a balanced life.  Choose to be happy and be inspired by all that surrounds you. 

We don't feel guilty about spending "me time" or doing things without our children and husbands.  It makes us better women!  #guiltfreelife

What have you done for yourself lately?

A relaxed and happy Candilaria