Do you ever wake up in the morning feeling like you just cannot get out of the bed?  Not because you are tired.  Not because you are tucked cozily underneath your covers. No no.  Because you dread going to a job you dislike.

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The more I talk to women about their jobs, the more I hear the word “Ugh!”.  I don’t know what the percentage is but it seems as if a lot of women are not very satisfied with what they are currently doing.  Several factors can cause these feelings, according to Dr. Katharine Brooks, executive director of the office of personal and career development at Wake Forest University and author of "You Majored in What? Mapping Your Path from Chaos to Career.” There might be a conflict between your interests and the duties of the position; the job might be too demanding or not demanding enough; lack of training for position; lack of job security; you may have a poor relationship with co-workers or a supervisor; you might be poorly compensated; you might be in bad or unsafe working conditions; or you’re burnt out.”

Why would anyone want to get out of their comfortable bed to go to a job feeling like that?? 

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A lot of us feel this way. Why?  Because we kind of have to.  Bills must be paid. People often stay in these jobs because they don’t realize what else they can do and what ends up happening is they fall into a rut.  A rut that you feel there is no way out of.  After all it’s all about stability and security, oh and pure comfort, that keeps us at these jobs we don’t like so much. 

Do you remember my post the other day about burning bras? LOL.  Do you think we feel this way because really we should be home raising our children and pouring ourselves into them? 

Well…I don’t know about y’all, but my job is my getaway from the kiddies!  It’s Ok to admit it. I ain shame!  It’s probably your escape to. Don’t lie.  Yes the stress is there.  And yes I work hard (most times) when at work.  BUT somehow it’s not the same as two screaming children in your ear, pulling on our leg, asking for this and that….non-stop…non….stop!

As much as I would love to be a stay at home mom….at the same time, I know me.  I know what I can take from what I cannot.  And trust me a full day…EVERY, SINGLE, DAY?  With these children??…HA…not going happen.  And as I mentioned in my previous post…I need a child-sitter AND a housekeeper.  I ain playin’! LOL

So, back to the point; maybe it’s just that we never took the time out to figure out what makes us happy or figure out exactly what our talents are.

I understand we all have circumstances that don’t allow us to do the things we would like to do.  There is time and of course financial obligations; that is a big one. Hello mortgage! Geesh!

But what would you do if you knew you couldn’t fail?  What are you desires? What are your dreams?  Where is your passion?
I’m here to encourage you, you can do it! Whatever it is you wish to do.  You can.  It’s easy to feel stuck in the “box”.  It’s easy to be scared.  But this is your well-being we’re talking about! (I am writing this post for myself just as much as I am for you!)

We want to be happy. Not stuck in jobs we don’t like so much that take up the majority of our lives!  Now, I’m not telling anyone to leave their jobs.  Next thing you know I’m receiving a bunch of e-mails saying yada yada yada…you told me to do it!  Nuh uh!

So here’s what you do. I stumbled on a few tips from a Forbes magazine article titled “What to do if you hate your job” written by Jacquelyn Smith. 

Here are a few of them...

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1. You assess yourself.  Figure out how it is that you got to this feeling.  Is it a new feeling?  Have you always felt this way? Is it that you simply cannot deal with some of your coworkers/supervisor? Is it the tasks you are asked to do? Do you dislike the environment? Make a pros and cons list and what you would like in a job.

2. Figure out if it’s you or the job you’re unhappy with.  Determine whether the things you’re unhappy with have to do with you, or the job.   This should help you figure out if moving is the right move. 

3. Talk to your direct report. Let your boss know.  There may be ways you can improve the situation, Brook says.

4. Set your career goals.  Where do you want to be in the next five years.  Brooks asks, “will your current role help you get there? If not, what would? And how can you move toward that?” These questions tend to put things into perspective for you.

5.  Look for opportunities within the company that you can see yourself doing. Maybe there are other positions within the company that you may be interested in.  Involve yourself with projects or initiatives in the company that would make you happy helping to improve the working experience.

6.  Don’t take it out on others. It’s never OK to be miserable on the job and treat your colleagues and clients unfavorably.  No one likes a miserable gus.

So with that said…

Whatever your desires, whatever you wish to do, you can do it!  Get out there, figure it out AND JUST DO IT!

“Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you have imagined.” - Henry David Thoreau 

Following my dreams, Candilaria

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Anonymous said...

I love my job. It allows me to express myself, utilize and continuously develop my most prized gift/talent. For the most part it’s not terribly stressful and I’m very well compensated…. There are times when my job can be a bit challenging depending on the project. There are also times when I’m extremely busy and there are those days when I have some free time to do a little personal work, which is even better.

However, if finances permitted I would be stay at home mom. I've heard many women speak about needing a break from their kids. I know that children can be very loud and have their spats etc but I've never experienced that. The noise really doesn’t bother me. Maybe I have a lot of patience, maybe something is wrong with me. People always ask how do I look so young and ask how do I stay so petite. My response is “it’s the kids, they keep me on toes.” Consequently, I’ve always loved children … long before I had my own. All I know is that I would much rather be the traditional housewife. I jus' love taking care of my home and not having to compromise my mommy/wifely duties and bonding time etc. because of my career.

Now, I could always use a housekeeper (keeping things in order with little people running around can be challenging) but a babysitter, no.

Different strokes for different folks I guess!

MWMs said...

Thank you for the comment! And you are very right, different strokes for different folks. You are very fortunate to be in a job/career that you really enjoy. That within itself is a blessing. Our jobs take up so much time of our lives that it is very important to be happy in what you are doing ESPECIALLY when your job takes you away from your children. Now, don't get me wrong, I would love to be a stay at home mom as well. My children are my everything. They are in school as well, so during the day when they're gone is more than enough time for me to enjoy my hobbies or work on my personal business. I have a housekeeper but need a babysitter when adult time (dinner, movies, etc.) is needed. Which is also very important! lol.

Anonymous said...

I concur!!!!! Of course adult time is a must!! That goes without saying. My husband and I manage to squeeze in adult time just about every night after 8pm (bedtime) *smile. And as for dinners etc, we take full advantage of the Able Grandparent & Aunts Babysitting Service! Afterall it's free lol. If our pick up hours run us into the am.... that's a job for the aunts. A quick movie is more so for the grandparents (can't keep grammie n papa up too late na) lol.